From a Coach: Issue #15

Ever hear a coach say something horrible and/or hilarious? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about things overheard at a game, at the gym or terrible sports gifts you've received.

My high school basketball coach was a well-meaning guy, but kind of a dummy. Our junior year after tryouts he was reading off the names of players who made the team. After 14 names he got to the last one: "And last but not least, it's Kevin – who can be very proud in knowing that he is the first Asian to play for this program." It was an odd thing to say. This was 2004 and who cares if he was the first Asian. But the oddest part was that Kevin wasn't Asian. He has black hair, but he was Italian. Coach was a weird guy.

– Adam

We had a girl on our high school wrestling team. She wrestled in the 110-pound weight class and won more than she lost. She was also fairly attractive. A few times in matches her opponent got a little "excited." After one such incident, the opposing coach came over to apologize to our coach for his wrestler getting a chub. My coach responded: "Hey, I understand. As long as you don't get one, we don't have a problem."

– Dennis

My friend and I were the last ones leaving the locker room after practice and we sat down to talk. We heard our defensive coordinator talking to another coach say: "Yeah, but the only probably with fingering a girl in the butthole is next they want something bigger." Yes, he said "butthole."

– James

I was one of the team captain of my high school baseball team my senior year. We had an 8:00 a.m. practiced scheduled one Saturday morning and before we were about to get going, coach called me and the other two captains into the dugout. "Boys," he said. "You were picked to be captains because your teammates look to you as leaders. And I do, too. So today you're running practice. Plus, I'm hungover as hell and feel like shit."

– Matthew

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Send your "Overheard From A Coach", "Overheard At The Game" or "Overheard At The Gym" or embarrassing sports apparel and memorabilia you have owned stories to OverheardSP at gmail.