Eli Manning Caught Practicing Those Faces in a Mirror

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New York Giants backup quarterback David Carr stumbled upon Eli Manning this morning in the team's locker room bathroom and was shocked by what he saw.

"Eli was standing there in front of the mirror, going through all of his faces — sad, depressed, confused, frustrated, crushed from the blindside, crushed in his face — all of them," said Carr, who went undetected by Manning. "I'm starting to think it's all an act."

Manning admitted as much when he was confronted later by head coach Tom Coughlin, who had been alerted of the incident by Carr.

"Yes, of course I make it on purpose," said Manning of ManningFace. "Do you really think someone could go through life making such ridiculous facial expressions and be completely unaware of it all? No way — unless they have some sort of mental disability, of course, which I do not. Let's just make that clear. I have an above-average IQ. The faces are an act, okay?"

Manning said he began making absurd faces during games in middle school to make the sport more fun.

"Football has been drilled into me since I was a little kid by my dad," said Eli. "Sometimes I didn't like it and wanted to do other things. But I finally decided: 'Fine, if I have to play, I'm going to look like an idiot doing it and there's nothing you can do about it.' Twenty years later, I feel like my faces have never been better. I've got more than a hundred, each one more pathetically hilarious than the next."

Manning denied that his famous quarterback brother, Peyton Manning, also makes ridiculous faces on purpose.

"No, that's my thing," said Eli. "Peyton just has a really strange head shape and messed up features. There's no telling where his face parts will go from one moment to the next."

The Giants signal-caller says he has a brand new stupid face to debut at the Super Bowl.

"I'm still working out the kinks as far as depth perception and keeping some peripheral vision," he said. "But my plan is to play the entire second half cross-eyed. I'll probably have some green snot running out of my nose, too. It's going to be hilarious."

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