Colts Continue Overhaul as Peyton Manning Has Team Owner Jim Irsay Brutally Murdered

The Indianapolis Colts continued their dramatic overhaul today as Peyton Manning had Jim Irsay brutally murdered. The team owner's head was placed on a spike outside the Colts' facility as a warning to others who might cross the star quarterback or threaten to replace him.

Irsay's slaughter and decapitation continues weeks of upheaval at the team's West 56th Street complex. Personnel executives Bill and Chris Polian were let go the day after the regular season ended and, after Irsay hired former Eagles player personnel director Ryan Grigson as the team's new GM, head coach Jim Caldwell was fired.

Grigson is now believed to be hiding somewhere in the Colts' facility as Manning, Manning's father Archie and the family's hired assassin search door-to-door for him.

FOX Sports' Jay Glazer was the first to report Irsay's murder, as he was on the phone with the owner when the Mannings and their hired goon arrived and overheard Irsay's cries for help.

"Fans see sports as fun, but it's a business," said Glazer. "Sometimes moves are made that might seem heartless or cruel. But show me a star player who hasn't been involved in the death of someone who has tried to get in their way. You can't."

Once the Mannings have replaced Grigson, who reportedly is trying to wriggle through a ventilation shaft which the Mannings are hacking away at with axes, a new general manager will be put in place — bringing more change to Colts' front office.

In other Colts news, Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck — the presumed No. 1 overall pick in the draft — announced today that he will return for his final season with the Cardinal.

"Yeah, I don't want to be murdered by the Mannings," he said. "Also, winning a national title is a nice goal, don't you think? But, yeah, mainly I don't want to die."