*1.* Only one team will finish the game with a record above .500.
2. Your head coach is undefeated. Because he is an interim coach and he's 0-0 for his career.
3. The majority of people at the game are wearing shoulder pads.
4. Most of the fans in the stands are wearing coats.
5. Several players violated team rules and were suspended not only for practice, but for the actual game.
6. The announcers spend the majority of the game talking about the players' NFL prospects and bowl games that are on later.
7. The announcers keep telling you that both teams are playing for "pride" and for "these seniors."
8. No one is chanting "S-E-C!"
9. The game is so boring you actually Google the name of the bowl sponsor to find out what kind of company it is.
10. The game is in a baseball stadium.
11. You had no trouble finding a cheap hotel right near the stadium.
12. You have to leave work early to watch the game on TV.
13. The teams' apparel companies didn't even bother dressing them in disgustingly modern uniforms.
14. You are playing a Big East team.
15. You are a Big East team.
16. A Big Ten team is playing and is favored to win.
17. One of the team's coaches is rumored to be interested in the Penn State job.
18. A MAC team or Notre Dame is playing.
19. Neither team has had a recruiting scandal or player arrest in the past year.
20. The game is for 0-percent of the Tostitos.