As plans for a six-stop World All-Star Classic that was to feature NBA superstars Kobe Bryant, Dwight Howard, Kevin Durant, Dwyane Wade and others are beginning to unravel, another group off NBA players has created their own worldwide tour designed to bring basketball to fans during the ongoing lockout.
Organized by Brian Scalabrine, Eddy Curry and Mike Bibby, the Basketball Laugh Track World Tour will stop in NBA D-League cities, as well as Kabul, Afghanistan, Libya, and the tiny European nation of Luxembourg.
"Hardcore basketball fans watch the NBA for more than just the stars," said Scalabrine at a press conference in Conference Room C at the Fort Wayne, Indiana airport Best Western. "They also watch to laugh at players like me and Eddy and Mike. Our ineptitude helps them relate to NBA players. We bring laughter to millions each winter."
Most tour stops will feature scrimmages between the LOLstars, which also include known NBA commodities Steve Novak, Kwame Brown and Sebastian Telfair, while other locations will pit the LOLstars against the Washington Generals or give fans in attendance a chance to beat them.
"I hope we only play half-court," said Curry. "What? They are full-court games? Ah, crap."
Tickets for the first five stops have already sold out.
"Don't underestimate the entertainment value of watching terrible NBA players play terribly," said Bibby. "Once you've seen one Dwight Howard dunk or Kevin Durant three-pointer, you've pretty much seen them all. But every time we come down the court you may see something you've never seen before. For example, in practice today I was dribbling and accidentally got the ball stuck inside my jersey somehow. That's entertainment right there."
Miami Heat forward Chris Bosh is expected to commit to the Tour this week.