From a Coach: Issue #4

Ever hear a coach say something horrible and/or hilarious? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about things overheard at a game, at the gym or terrible sports gifts you've received.

In order to get my football team excited about the next day's game, my 7th grade football coach told us to "get some wood."

– Benny

Our high school football team had a blitz package that was called Hurricane Blast. Nearly a week after Hurricane Katrina struck in 2005, our defensive coordinator was giving his weekly pre-game motivational speech. Among many of the idiotic things he said, one that stuck with everyone was, "When I call for a Hurricane Blast, I want you to do what Katrina did! I want you to leave those kids homeless and devastated!" He had forgotten that Texas is pretty close to New Orleans, and that one of our players' grandparents lost their home in the flood. We all just looked around shaking our heads.

– Dick

When I was in high school weight training and health was taught by our football coaches.

Health was by far my favorite class in high school. It's not that the topics were overly interesting, but everyday our head coach would do something moronic in front of the class. My personal favorite being his spelling of the word, "poison" which he once spelled p-o-i-z-e-n.

One day I was dressing for weight training and me and my friends were getting into a heated conversation about the local sports teams. I suppose we were taking too long to get to the field house and the coach showed up in the locker room, and said the following (in a very Slingblade-esque voice):

"What are you bunch of queers doing flap-jawing in here? I don't like queers. My wife is making me take a sensitivity course and I have to hang out with a queer every day after practice."

Needless to say the coach was later fired for calling one of the "out" kids at school a "queer".

– Chase

In high school I had a particularly loud and angry wrestling coach. He used to keep cheerleader skirts next to the door in case someone asked to go to the trainer for ice, his response was: "Sure, but put the skirt on so the trainer knows who he is giving ice to." He also kept tampons in the med kit, just in case someone complained of a hurt finger or something, he would throw the tampon at them and say, "Maybe this will solve your problem". It wasn't until I got to college I realized this wasn't normal coaching behavior.

– Evan

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Send your "Overheard From A Coach", "Overheard At The Game" or "Overheard At The Gym" or embarrassing sports apparel and memorabilia you have owned stories to OverheardSP at gmail.