Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.
This happened years ago when I was in middle school gym class, but one of my best friends got a noticeable erection while the gym teacher was demonstrating a wrestling move on him.
Tuesday night I'm at the gym with my workout buddies. A guy listening to his iPod was working beside us on the leg press machine. Late in his set, a few loud, chirping farts slip out. I guess he didn't hear them until the end, when he suddenly looked up with a shocked/embarrassed look on his face, saw everyone staring at him and got up, standing there for a second thinking what to do. Suddenly he grabbed the spray bottle near him, sprayed the seat where he was sitting, wiped it off and then walked away quickly with his head hung.
We appreciated the clean up effort, but unless he sharted, his wipe up didn't accomplish much.
What's with naked old dudes in gyms? Last time I went there was this completely naked old guy with one leg up on the sink counter, blow drying his gray balls with the hand dryer. What's worse, there was a mirror on counter wall, so everybody got a 360 degree view: the taint, balls, shaft and everything. Everyone else in the locker room just stood there in stunned horror. I'll never look at Captain Morgan the same.
So I got off the ice after a stick and puck workout, get to the locker room and a dude wearing a Wolverines jersey (a local B team) asks me where I got my Moscow Dynamo jersey.
So I tell him and finish by complimenting his jersey by doing my best Charlie Sheen version of "WOLVERINES!!!!!" … arms up and everything. He asks what that was all about, so I ask if he's ever seen "Red Dawn" — you know with Patrick Swayze and Charlie Sheen defeating the Soviets. He says "no" and about this time I kind of noticed an accent so I asked him where he was from. His response … "Moscow." FML.
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Send your "Overheard At The Game" or "Overheard At The Gym" stories to OverheardSP at gmail.