The Gym: Issue #8

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the games.

I was playing pickup basketball at the rec center at my college. In between games, one of the guys starts chatting with one of his friends that was walking by. He asked if the guy wanted to play, and the guy responded, "I can't, I'm only working out legs today and I've got a case race starting in an hour." For reference, it was 6:30 pm.

– Adam

My gym has a digital board that wraps around part of the weight room and treadmill area. It runs gym notifications about hours of operation and specials and stuff like that, but it also runs "motivational" message like "Push yourself and see results!"

Last week, I don't know if someone new got the message board entry job or the gym manager had a brain fart or what, but while I was on the treadmill I saw the following messages mixed in with the normal stuff:

"Push yourself. Don't be a pussy!"

"Can't is a bitch."

– Miranda

Freshmen year, our gym was home to an upperclassman female body builder. Despite standing only 5'4" at best, she was completely ripped and could probably kick the asses of half the men in the gym in a fight. It didn't matter what time you went to the gym, she was always there lifting or flexing in front of the mirror. She would scream loudly during her reps, like some women tennis players do.

One night while I was working out, she was attempting to squat more weight than she could handle, and literally fell over with the bar. She rolled around on the ground in pain, screaming louder than ever, as everyone stopped mid-work out staring at her trying to figure out what happened. One of the trainers came over to try to help, but she just yelled at him "DON'T F***ING TOUCH ME!," to which he raised his hands in the air and backed away. She was down for a good couple minutes before limping away to the locker room.

– Max

One day my buddies and I are at the gym doing our average workout when the guy we call "most massive human alive" comes in. Mind you, we go to a gym full of the biggest meatheads on the planet and are regularly dwarfed by 'roided out freaks, yet this guy has earned that title as the king of all of them. He walks straight over to the bench press and starts doing set after set, putting an additional 45 plate on occasionally, all the while using his girlfriend as a spotter.

He's attracted the attention of the entire gym, myself and my buddies included, so we stop what we're doing just to watch. He gets up to 405 pounds, and finally some guy goes, "Yo man, you need a spot?" He looks at the guy, then looks at his little girlfriend next to him who's maybe 100 pounds, then looks back at the guy and goes, "Naw, she got it."

What a boss.

– Mike

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Send your "Overheard At The Game" or "Overheard At The Gym" stories to OverheardSP at gmail.