Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.
So I'm at a Rangers-Devils hockey game at the Prudential Center in Newark. It's in between periods and I'm waiting on line in the bathroom and there's a Rangers fan and Devils fan emptying their kidneys right next to each other at the urinal. They're talking some smack back and forth, when all of a sudden the Devils fan, in one of the classiest things I've ever seen in my life, turns his entire body to the left and pisses on the Rangers fan's leg. The Rangers fan promptly hits the Devils fan square on the chin with a left hook that instantly sent the Devs fan into La-La Land, out cold on the piss-soaked men's room floor.
Security responded and detained the Rangers fan, before everyone in the bathroom explained what exactly happened, to which security cuffed the now-barely conscious Devils fan and let the Rangers guy walk away.
This is still probably the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life. A few years ago I was at a Nuggets game and had seats a few rows off the court 'cause my friend got them from work. In typical NBA fashion the refs were terrible and a guy near us really started going in on them. At one point when there was a dead ball and everything was fairly quiet he stands up and yells: "ARE YOU BLIND, REF?! ARE YOU F**KING BLIND!" And not two beats later an actual blind guy one row behind him stands up and says: "YEAH! ARE YOU BLIND OR WHAT?" and then proceeds to hold his hand out for high-fives from everyone around him.
Easily the coolest blind guy ever.
I didn't see this actually happen, but my sister was at the game and I have no reason to doubt her story. She went to a Phillies playoff game and everyone had those white rally towels. A man a couple rows in front of her was really drunk and got up to use the bathroom or get a beer or something … but when he stood up, he puked all over the place under his seat.
Everyone around him was pretty disgusted, of course. But that was only the start of it. To show he was okay, the vomit guy then picked up his rally towel and waved it around his head going "WOOOOOOOOOO!" Unfortunately, his towel had been on the ground and was half covered in his puke so all he did was rally-towel his vomit around about a 20-seat radius.
I was at opening day of the Atlanta Braves a couple years back. My friends and I were sitting around row 5 or 6 in the upper deck. A large group of college students wearing "Yellow Jacket Band" sweatshirts filled up the rest of the rows above us in the section. About inning 3 they started throwing popcorn and other food at each other. As popcorn rained down on me and my friends a ho tdog hits a young girl in front of us in the head. Her father, a mountainous bouncer-looking man, easily 6'5" and 3 bills, stands up and booms "NEXT ONE OF YOU F**KERS THROWS ANYTHING DOWN HERE IS GETTING THEIR ASS WHUPPED!"
No sooner does he sit down then a shoe flies down and narrowly misses his wife. He grabs the shoe, walks up to the 20th row to find the tall scrawny band geek with the missing shoe (stupid) and lifts him out of the chair by his collar. The kid defiantly throws his whole bucket of popcorn in the giant man's face. The giant man snaps and punches the kid in the face and sends the kid end over end from the 20th row down to my row.
The big man casually walks down to his row grabs his coat and family, looks at the terrified and dazed college student and says: "Don't throw anymore popcorn, asshole" and walks out of the stadium.
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Send your "Overheard At The Game" or "Overheard At The Gym" stories to OverheardSP at gmail.