Despite constant debate on sports radio, television, message boards and in sports bars and around water coolers nationwide, the NFL has announced today that the best football team of the season will not be determined until February 6, 2011, at the conclusion of a game dubbed the Super Bowl.
"I really hate to inform everyone that they're wasting their time, and it's truly with great regret that I virtually put an entire industry like sports radio out of business," said NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. "But we already have a system in place that will decide the best team. So until the playoffs work themselves through and that game on February 6th is over, I would encourage everyone to talk about something else."
Goodell acknowledged he can by no means prevent anyone from continuing to debate the NFL's best team, but stressed that doing so "is incredibly pointless" and "in the end, will probably only make you look stupid when the actual best team is crowned."
But FOX Sports Radio personality J.T. The Brick vowed that he and others like him will continue the discussion.
"What the commissioner is not getting," said The Brick, "is that it doesn't matter who the best team is on February 6th. Right now I can say that the Patriots are the best team in the NFL and if or when they lose in the playoffs, I can then just say that they were the best team at the time I said they were. Also, another nice trick is blaming your pick's demise on poor coaching or bad officiating. It's sort of a passive-aggressive way of saying that you're still right."
Despite Goodell's statement about the best NFL team, he stated that people could feel free to debate the worst team in the NFL.
"However, that's also a fairly pointless discussion," he said. "It's the Carolina Panthers."