Training Camp Postcard: New Orleans Saints

Our reporter spent the day at New Orleans training camp in Metairie, Louisiana. Here are his notes.

> Running back Reggie Bush hasn't washed his undercarriage since breaking up with Kim Kardashian, hoping her remnants will be enough to secure another championship.
> Saints veterans hazed the team's rookies by making them carry their bags around and also carry huge douchebag Jeremy Shockey around.
> Head coach Sean Payton, author of Home Team: Coaching the Saints and New Orleans Back to Life, has been busy working on a new chapter for the paperbook release of his book in which he takes credit for saving oil-coated pelicans with his high-octane offense.
> Fourth-year tackle Jermon Bushrod continues to insist he is not an adult film star.
> The Saints say they are focused and don't expect a Super Bowl letdown. "The only thing we can't control is injuries," said Payton. "But I think we'll be okay even if we do suffer injuries because I still know how to pick the lock to the painkillers cabinet."
> Most scouts say that Drew Brees' Madden cover appearance, mixed with New Orleans' normal bad luck, will likely result in a plane crashing into him by Week 5.
> Saints offensive linemen will show you their tits if you give them beads.


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