Eli Manning learns about blood

Eli: Hey! Everybody! There’s ketchup on my face. How did I get ketchup on my face?!

Trainer: That’s not ketchup Eli.
Eli: Is it strawberry jam? I like strawberry jam.

Trainer: No. It’s not strawberry jam either.

Eli: Well what is it? I’m hungry for a snack now. Mom said I couldn’t eat before the game because I’d get a tummy ache. Do you have any Lunchables?

Trainer: Not right now. I have to take care of your head.

Eli: What’s wrong with it?

Trainer: Well, Eli. I don’t know how to tell you this, but … your head is bleeding. Your head is covered in blood, not ketchup or strawberry jam.

Eli: Blood?

Trainer: Yes.

Eli: What’s blood?

Trainer: Well … it’s a liquid that circulates through your arteries and veins and brings oxygen and nutrients to tissue.

Eli: Ketchup has nutrients.

Trainer: Yes. I suppose it does.

Eli: Can I have a snack now?

Trainer: Not yet. I’m still working on your head.

Eli: I’m glad it’s blood and not ketchup. I spilled a plate of fish sticks last week and got ketchup all over the carpet. Mom didn’t let me watch Dora. Can you tell her that this is blood and not ketchup?

Trainer: Sure.

Eli: Can I have a snack now?

Trainer: Almost. I just have to finish these stitches. I have to say, Eli, you’re being very brave about this! You’re becoming a big boy!

Eli: Thanks. That’s what my mom said when I woke up this morning and found mayonnaise in my Toy Story underwear.