Awesome trade rumor found deep inside reporter’s ass

Milwaukee Brewers beat writer Jeff Walker discovered a trade rumor way up in his ass today that would send Prince Fielder to the Yankees for Joba Chamberlain. "Admittedly, there's absolutely no basis to the rumor," Walker said on Milwaukee sports radio. "But any good reporter knows that when you're in the bind for a story, looking in your ass is the best place to pull some news." Despite its dubious source, Walker's ass scoop was picked up by national media outlets across the country and run as legitimate. "This could be great for my career," he said. "If I can find more stuff in my ass, I have a chance to be a media star."