10 Reasons You Should Root for Duke

1. Seriously? The fact that you even clicked on this link, thinking there could be real reasons to root for Duke — DUKE! — proves you are disgusting. Sub-human. Loathsome. Which makes you just like Duke. And everyone and everything associated with the team and the university.
2. I mean, just look at Mike Krzyzewski. Or Jon Scheyer's face. Just … just … what is wrong with you?
3. The Journal of Blacks in Higher Education hasranked Duke as the best university in the country as far as the integration of African-American students and faculty.
4. Bobby Hurley, Steve Wojciechowski, Greg Paulus. The list goes on and on. Not a likable guy in the bunch.
5. Christian Laettner. Christian freaking Laettner! What a dick!
6. The endowment that created Duke University required the school to"open its doors to women, placing them on an equal footing with men."
7. Duke University is regularly commended by national publications and foundations for its outstanding community service programs.
8. They seem to get a lot of calls from the refs!
9. Even with winning championships across its athletic program, Duke regularly has some of the best graduation rates in the NCAA.
10. Shut up! Just shut up!