Chicago White Sox: 2010 Preview

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010. Today: Chicago White Sox (2009: 79-83, 3rd in AL Central)

STARTING PITCHINGThe White Sox should have the best rotation in the division with Mark Buerhle, Jake Peavy, John Danks and Gavin Floyd. It's also a balanced rotation that goes lefty, right, lefty, righty, Freddy Garcia— who is listed as a righty, but could probably be just as effective these days with his left arm.
LINEUPIn players like Gordon Beckham, Juan Pierre andAlex Rios, manager Ozzie Guillen continues to build the athletic lineup that he has always wanted. Athletes. Playing baseball. What a stupid idea. Guillen should be fired now before this foolish experiment gets out of hand.
BULLPENWith closer Bobby Jenks, setup man Matt Thornton and new acquisition J.J. Putz, the bullpen should be a strength for the White Sox. And this should be a lesson to Guillen. Look at Jenks up there. He's one of the best in the game at his position. And he's a big lard ass with huge tits. You could fit three of these stupid "athletes" in one of Jenks' pant legs and they wouldn't be half as good as him.
BENCHThe most intriguing member of the White Sox bench is 24-year-old rookie catcher Tyler Flowers, who should get some at-bats this season and is slated to takeover the starting position from A.J. Pierzynski in 2011. Flowers projects as a better hitter than Pierzynski, but inferior behind the plate and much less of a prick.
OVERALLThe White Sox should battle for a playoff spot. Those are the expectations. If they fail to live up to that, the meltdown should be incredibly awesome because Ozzie Guillen is on Twitter now. Did you know the seven dirtiest curse words, the ones you can't say on TV, only take up 42 characters of Twitter's 140 allowance? Ozzie can post them three times in a row and still have 14 characters left for "assholebitches".