The dream of millions of men around the world was met today when it was reported that tennis vixen Anna Kournikova will appear in a provocative Playboy article.
"Finally, men will get what they've wanted for years from Miss Kournikova," said Playboy founder Hugh Hefner. "A chance to learn about her innermost thoughts and dreams, her political opinions, likes, dislikes and most life-changing experiences. I can feel the blood flowing to my brain already."
Unfortunately, Kournikova will only be partially revealed in Playboy, as she did not agree to a full feature story. But even without being the subject of the hard-hitting, long-form journalism everyone turns to the venerable publication for, most expect the Kournikova article to be quite intellectually titillating.
"This is a smart, young successful woman who has lived all over the world and met all kinds of amazing people," said Playboy writer Marc Vandengard, who was lucky enough to get up close and personal with Kournikova for the interview. "By agreeing to be in Playboy, she can be an example to young women all over the world."
Kournikova says it has always been a dream of hers to be in Playboy.
"I feel like I am in my prime right now," she said. "I think my mind is as strong as it will ever be. That's why, before it gets too late and before I have children and get a little scattered, that I sit down and give a good, in-depth interview on serious topics affecting the world today. Then one day when I'm old and gray, I can look back proudly at my appearance in Playboy and remember that I once had it all going for me."
Readers are unanimously excited about the upcoming Playboy appearance.
"I've long imagined how she would be completely stripped down — nothing holding her back from a straight, candid, revealing interview," said longtime Playboy subscriber Matt Derescher. "So it sounds like my fantasy is finally going to come true. I just hope there aren't any distracting photos accompanying the article. Especially not of her naked breasts, butt or vagina."