Handicapper: NFL Divisional Round

4:30 p.m. ET

Arizona at New Orleans (-7)
The Saints are asking all their fans to dress in black. And don't forget New Orleans' history with Voodoo and the dark arts. And then consider they have to play Kurt Warner. All of this is why Pat Robertson is picking the Cardinals to win 175 to death-by-locusts.
My pick: Arizona (and to win)
8:00 p.m. ET
Baltimore at Indianapolis (-6.5)
This is a big game. Yes, it's the playoffs. But more because we'll have a definite answer on whether it's right or not to rest your starters for the playoffs. So that will be decided and then the sports media will get to spend it's time on bigger issues. Like their shock and outrage over baseball players who used steroids. Or their shock and outrage over college coaches taking better jobs. Our their shock and outrage over whatever story breaks next.
My pick: Indianapolis
1:00 p.m. ET
Dallas at Minnesota (-2.5)
If you like watching quarterbacks play like kids out there, this is the game for you.
Ha! That was a setup, pervert! Watch this game and you'll get a knock on the door from Chris Hanson.
My pick: Dallas (and to win)
New York Jets at San Diego (-7)
The Jets are way overmatched in this game. And then there is this stat — and recall that stats mean everything: Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez hasn't won a game in Southern California in more than a year. This guy just can't win when he's not playing in cold weather.
My pick: San Diego***

Last week vs. spread: 1-3

Last week just winners: 1-3
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Season vs. spread: 136-118-4
Season just winners: 177-82
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***Lukewarm Locks last week: 0-0

***Lukewarm Locks season: 18-17