Sidney Crosby Announces He Has Begun Growing His Playoff Beard

In a sign some see as confidence in his team's postseason chances, and others see as evidence he still has yet to hit puberty, Pittsburgh Penguins superstar Sidney Crosby revealed today that he has already begun growing his playoff beard, some six months short of the start of the playoffs.
"I need to start now if I hope to have any hair visible come April for the playoffs," Crosby said. "In past years I started right after the New Year and it was too late. Way too late, as you probably saw."
Crosby, now 22 years-old and beginning his fifth season in the NHL, says he is sure his new approach will give him a full beard in time for the Stanley Cup Finals.
"No one will mock me anymore," he says. "For that specific thing, at least."
But those close to the superstar doubt that not shaving for the entire regular season will produce the results Crosby is expecting.
"I remember how it was back when I was a kid," says veteran Penguins right wing Bill Guerin. "You want that facial hair, you want to look like a man, so you never shave. But all that does is create a whole lot of peach fuzz, which is really more humiliating than no facial hair at all. You have to shave a lot to build up a good beard. The more you shave the thicker it gets. It's kind of counter-intuitive, but that's how it works."
Crosby isn't buying it, though.
"I've tried that approach and look," he said, dropping his towel. "Still no armpit hair and still no pubes. Some day, though. Some day."