Player with turf dick has some explaining to do

New York Giants special teamer Rodney Mitchell is likely out for next week's game and possibly longer due to what team medical personnel are calling a bad case of "turf dick." "I am told it's like turf toe, only it's … you know, not affecting his toe," said a noticeably uncomfortable Tom Coughlin at today's press conference. "If you want to know how he suffered the injury, you'll have to ask Rodney himself. I do not know, nor do I want to know." Mitchell did not provide many details. "I really like being out on the football field," he said. "That's all I'll say. And I want to get out there again as soon as possible."