Jon Bon Jovi penning unlistenable ballad about the breakup of the Arena League

Philadelphia Soul owner and rock superstar Jon Bon Jovi has put his disappointment over the demise of the Arena Football League into his work, resulting in a cliche-ridden ballad about heartache and hope that is sure to please Bon Jovi's millions of moron fans. "I called it 'Arena of the Heart,'" says Jovi. "I think it ranks up there with some of the best stuff I've done." The song includes the lines "We cheered for the Soul / but all that was left was a hole … oh-whoa" and "They put walls around our field / yet they were the ones with walls around their heart." Jovi also announced that Soul co-owner Ron Jaworski will join the band for its upcoming fall tour.