Tim Tebow’s new pledge

After Tim Tebow's Florida Gators lost to Ole Miss last year, he famously made "The Pledge" — a promise that fueled the Gators to the national title and is now forever memorialized in plaque form on Florida's campus.
Today Tebow made a new pledge at SEC media day and vowed he will remain a virgin until he is married.
I wasn't there to hear Tebow's comments, but I imagine they went something like this:
To the fans and everybody in Gator Nation, I'm horny. I'm extremely horny.
You were hoping to do me. That was your goal, something no one has ever done to me down there.
I promise you one thing: a lot of good will come out of this. You will never see any player in the entire country play as hard as I will this season. You will never see someone with more untapped energy and frustration as I will have this season and until I get married.
You will never see a guy harder than I will be the rest of the season. And I mean that literally. I am so hard right now.
Goddam!


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